M is moving here to Santa Cruz this week. There has been more drama this weekend than I’ve had in my life for a while. I don’t appreciate or enjoy it.

I’ve explained so many times to so many people what’s going on in my life that it’s hard for me to actually write it all out here now.

M is my ex boyfriend. Since we broke up I have been very clear about where I’m at and what I’m doing. He lives in Idaho. Well he lived in Idaho. Now he’s moving back here.

A lot of things were said this weekend and I’m just a complete ball of stress about it. So all this M drama and a new job on top of my injury,  and the fact that I’m not working (read: no income) I’m just ready to melt down.

I feel responsible for his happiness even though I absolutely 100% am not. He’s giving me ultimatums and demands that are impossible for me to fulfill and I feel pressured to make decisions prematurely. Suddenly everything I was prepared to deal with in October are happening right now.

I just have to hold it together.