family

JUNE 2026

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Well, June.

What do I say to June? It’s the first month of Summer. It could be the wellspring and opening of gates. Glorious.

Instead it’s the beginning of a smoke ridden nightosphere that is known as Oregon.

Lets catch up on somethings. My husband M now lives in Seattle while I still reside in the Columbia Gorge. Sounds dramatic!! It’s not. We’ve had to do many a long distance stints while he was getting his career aligned with fisheries related occupations that it doesn’t even phase me anymore. Frankly, I don’t mind the alone time.

There are struggles, but M is not the source of them. I miss my Mother, my dog, my happiness. Work has me filling two and a half positions, which equates to 100 work hours a week, and I’m balancing at 50. I’m exhausted. On top of the work duties I squeeze into my 50 hour work week my weekends are booked.

This weekend, Juneteenth holiday, I have my annual girls trip. We are heading out to ZigZag, Oregon to a lovely cabin. Many pics incoming.

Then it’s the work holiday Party.

then it’s my trip to seattle.

then then tehn tehn tehntehasehjdt;galsidhga’esdpg

My house is a mess. I do my best to keep my life and clothes clean, but jesus, the chores are never ending.

I’m realizing how often I took my husband for granted. The things he did because my depression made me incapable. I’m slowly remembering all of the hobbies I had that my depression separated me from. I’m not ready to dive back into those hobbies, but, I’m getting there.

As always, I miss my Mother. There is family drama that I am unwilling or unable to detail out. However I feel it would’ve been nipped in the bud had my mother still be present. She didn’t suffer any fools.

xoxo
Amb

Out of My Mind

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So much in so few days. I haven’t had a chance to paint anymore due to my work schedule. Which is sad sad times, but now that I have the next few days off I should be able to make time!

My brother arrived today from Oregon. I can’t begin to express how happy I am that he’s here. He’s one of my favorite people in the whole world and just having him around for the next few weeks will help me clear my head and get back to some kind of normalcy. I hope.

M and I went and got dinner at Shadowbrook last night because I felt like throwing money away and eating something delicious. We both got food poisoning. I called them today and the person I spoke to basically told me that it sucks for me but hey thanks for calling! Fuck you Shadowbrook. I tell Mike what happened and then he called them.. and they called me.. blahblah. Apparently the Chef was supposed to call me but they didn’t (go figure) and again on the phone the manager expressed that they’re only sending me a gift card because the service was shitty but I wasn’t food poisoned by them. And I told him he sucks at customer service.

Okay, no I didn’t. At this point though I was already over it. Yes, here’s my address, send me a gift card, I’ll just spend it in the bar.

Stupid. Ugh.

My back went crazy a few nights ago and it’s slowly been getting better as I’ve been taking it very easy. It’s still rough though. Every time I think I’m finally getting over that final hump in recovery something happens and I go back five steps. This time the pain was of a new flavor. It sent shooting pains down the front of my legs as well. Weird and unpleasant.

I got new tires today! So that’s awesome. I needed them.

Time to go drink a beer and visit with the fam.

Later Gators.